If you’re wondering what I mean, see if any of this sounds familiar?
- Everyone ignores me in the meeting/class/workshop/conferences.
- I’m always dumped on/given more work/forgotten.
- Others have more fun/time to talk/goof off.
Oh, I’m sure I can think of a dozen more. Some that I’ve even said before I caught myself.
Really, people, most of those statements are simply because you won’t stand up for yourself or open up. Yes. I’m an extrovert, but I do have moments where I feel insecure. You wouldn’t know it but when I was a kid, I stuttered. Not terribly bad, but bad enough for people to poke fun at me. I still stutter when I get angry or extremely nervous. Plus I have difficulties pronouncing certain words. A little quirk of mine. I know what they mean, just don’t use them often enough in speech. And anyone who sees pictures of me know I’m overweight. Over the years, I’ve heard enough about that to be self-conscious.
Okay, what I’m getting to is that everyone have issues and insecurities. When you feel dumped on, ignored, or/and left out, stop and think of how you can fix it. More times than I can count the problem starts with yourself.
If I don’t want to feel that way, I found if I open myself up, things change. If they act like an asshole, the world is large. look for another friend, nice acquaintance or companion. There are others out and about who are in the same spot.
So keep that in mind next time you feel like a martyr.
Why do you think all of those nerd movies are so successful? One nerd finds like minded nerds to hang around.
Carla Swafford, Author 