Men – Page 3 – Carla Swafford, Author

The Ties That Bind

Posted on May 24, 2014May 25, 2014 by Carla Swafford, Author

I don’t know if you figured it out yet, but I’m at times a little off beat. A couple weeks ago, I came across this picture. No face or body, but it goes to prove how sexy a man’s hands and forearms can be. So freaking masculine. There is something sexy about seeing a lean, well-muscled man in cuffs. All that strength under control

A man’s fingers can tell you a lot. Calluses say the man works with his hands, digging ditches or carving wood. Long fingers are usually associated with surgeons and pianists; thick fingers with brawn and the more masculine pursuits.

I’ve never been wild about rings on men, except maybe a wedding band, but whoa! The rings in the picture say to me he’s a bit of a rebel. A biker. Maybe even a musician.

Yep. Not all men need to be military alpha males. Tied up, they become pure sexual beings. Yum.

Yes. You’re right. I have a vivid imagination.

Men, Odd Observation

Finding Romance In Strange Places

Posted on May 3, 2014May 3, 2014 by Carla Swafford, Author

I get so tickled when I’m watching a TV show or movie and realize parts of it have many of the same elements of the books I read (romance). Especially if the show is written by a male.

Yes. I’m a bit of a female chauvinist. Sure males can write romance, but you have to remember for centuries when they did they almost always killed off one or more of the protagonists in the end, e.g., Romeo & Juliet.

Anyway, I was watching a movie that I had never expected to see romance in it. Plus it had a wonderful lesson to share. The movie? Don Jon. Yes. You read that right. The movie with Joseph Gordon-Levitt — oh, my he has grown up. He plays a young fellow who learns there’s more to fucking than the physical act.

See, Jon likes to hang with his boys, takes good care of his car, home and body, and is a player. But he loves porn more than anything. To him, porn sex is more real and satisfying than the genuine thing.

Now for the spoilers. But first, if you’re thinking of watching the movie and you should, you might want to come back and read this later or you can read on and see if you agree with what I say here.

It’s not the great movie of the decade, but it’s entertaining, and did I mention Joseph Gordon-Levitt has grown up? Yum! download

At first I thought, oh, no, it’s going to be about sex and not good sex, and it won’t make any sense, and I will be pissed when the credits roll in. But as the movie went along, you can see there is so much going on. He’s open to change. Maybe inside he realizes he’s not happy with his life.

About halfway through the movie, he loses his girlfriend because he lies to her about watching porn. But it is an older woman who teaches him the best lessons.

One, that porn is not real. They’re actors. All this time, he’d been looking for a woman who would act like them. He wanted all the pleasure but wasn’t willing to do the same for his partner. The older woman asked him, had he ever jerked off without watching porn? He hadn’t. That gets him to thinking. So he stops watching it. Suddenly, he has more time to do other things. He calms down and starts to enjoy life more.

And then the woman tells him one really big truth. For him to enjoy sex, he needs to make love to his partner, he needs to lose himself in her.

Though the movie doesn’t end with him confessing everlasting love to the older woman, he understands by making sure his partner is enjoying sex, his pleasure will be so much more satisfying. In turn, his partner will lose herself in him. That good sex is a shared experience. Just as much as a mental thing as it is physical.

I was totally surprised by the message of the movie. A total unlikely premise saying what so many romance novels tell us.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt wrote the screenplay. The fellow does have layers. Talented.

If you decide to watch it, don’t go in expecting anything. Just sit back and be entertained. It’s funny in some parts. Tony Danza (Who’s The Boss) plays his dad and is a hoot. His mom is played by Glenne Headly (I remember her from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, but others may from Monk). But as you can imagine, you certainly shouldn’t have children in the room while you watch it. And there’s a lot more to it than what I mentioned here.

Men, My Books

Strangers In The Night

Posted on April 6, 2014April 7, 2014 by Carla Swafford, Author

If you had the chance to be in the car alone for about twenty or thirty minutes with one of your all-time favorite authors, who would it be?

I had that opportunity in 2009. My writers group has a romance readers luncheon every first Saturday in November. That year it was Anne Stuart. Oh, my GOD! I was so excited. She and Linda Howard are two authors that I want to be compared to whenever someone reads my romantic suspense.

Anne was flying into the Birmingham airport and I volunteered (yeah, like I would let anyone else do that) to pick her up. I was so tickled, I even took off a half day from work. Who can concentrate when they’re picking up a rock star?

So there I was waiting for the time, unable to eat or read. If I can’t do two of my four favorite things, I’m really wound up. (By the way, if you’re curious, the other two are writing and sex, not necessarily in that order.)

The time finally arrives and I’m standing near the concourse exit. I’m holding a sign with her pen name on it, so she’ll know who’s picking her up. A large crowd comes through, warning me that the flight had deplaned. No Anne. Huh? Did I miss her in the crowd? Had she changed so much from Washington DC when I met her for the first time that I overlooked her? OMG! THE HORROR!

Then I crane my neck to look down the long hallway, and I see a man pushing a woman in a wheelchair. ANNE! (I read somewhere she has a bad knee.) Then I flip my sign, and she bursts out laughing (love her laugh). What did it say?

I had a feeling she would appreciate the humor, so I said, “And I don’t own a sledgehammer.” She roared with laughter and said, “I sure hope not.”

On the way to the hotel, I had around twenty minutes to gush all over her about how much I loved her books, telling her my favorites, and then I asked about what she was writing. And somewhere along the way, she asked about my writing. Before I knew it, we were at the hotel. Talk about loving every minute with her, it was fabulous. A time I’ll never forget.

Be sure to put her books on your list to read. In fact, the last couple weeks she has been celebrating forty years (amazing!) in the business and been giving away downloads at Amazon and sometimes B&N. Click here for her blog. Click here for her Facebook page. But be aware, most of Anne’s heroes are tough and almost scary alpha. Her Ice series are some of the best and most unique romantic suspense I’ve ever read. What makes them unique?

The hero doesn’t have issues with being a badass. They make hard decisions and don’t sit around mourning the results. They are at times rough and maybe even a little cruel to the heroines. The heroes are tough men and expect the women they are fascinated by (and they are always drawn to the heroines despite what is best for him) to understand where they’re coming from. Since this is fiction, I love these heroes. In real life, hell no. They would scare the shit out of me.

And her women are strong. Some can kick butt as well as the guys, but those who can’t (kick butt), know how to stand up them. Oh, yeah, with great results.

If any of that sounds familiar, it’s because I’m such a fan that my heroes and heroines are a little like hers. I’m not saying I’m the caliber of writer that she is. But I will tell you that one of my reviews did compare my first book to Anne’s Ice series. I was thrilled.

Maybe soon I’ll tell you how I met Sherrilyn Kenyon and Linda Howard.

Men, Writing

Heroes With Mommy Issues

Posted on March 29, 2014 by Carla Swafford, Author

One of my old favorite romances is a medieval that the hero was a bastard (figuratively and literally). His distrust of women stemmed from his mother’s abandonment when he was a child. That theme ran through many romances back in the seventies and eighties, probably for centuries before that too. Nowadays we see less of that (the bastard resenting the mother who had them out of wedlock), but we still see it in other forms.

The hero whose wife or mother cheated on him or his father or the wife that didn’t want children or did want children when he didn’t. Or the hero with a step-father he hates and the mother he resents because she married the man. You get the idea. The list does go on.

It’s really a shame that moms get such a bum wrap. Being a mom, I can tell you that most of us try not to make mistakes but we all do.

But moms (and dads) are so important to our lives and using them as the deeply rooted reason for the hero’s (or heroine’s) actions could be considered an easy out for some, but really that’s right on track. Our parents have a tremendous impact on how we react to stress and challenges, and how we deal with and love others.

One thing about writing, the author almost has to be a psychologist.

Circle of Danger, Circle of Deception, Circle of Desire, Men, My Books, Writing

Hero Angst of The Circle Books

Posted on February 21, 2014February 20, 2017 by Carla Swafford, Author

Beware – some spoilers mixed in.

Who doesn’t love a hero with a problem? It could be the trouble-making heroine he’s fallen in love with or it could be the garbage he brought to the story from years before. Sherrilyn Kenyon is great at making the hero suffer as a kid and young adult. I’m sure there are other authors who do the same. Personally, I believe I pick on the heroine more than the hero, but I thought I would go over the angst that came out of my stories for the men.

CIRCLE OF DESIRE

In his twenties, Collin Ryker was the lead operative of the internal group of deadly mercenaries called the OS (Onyx Scepter), the heart of The Circle. When he realized his guardian, Theo, the head of the organization his father built, was insane, he convinced most of the operatives in the OS to follow him and split off from The Circle. The decision had been a hard one as when his parents had died in a car bomb, Theo had been there for him.

He’d lost his whole family when that car exploded and had to deal with survivor’s guilt. He worked at being like the father he admired by being emotionless and cold in his decision making. To him, that was a sign of a great leader. But when it came to Olivia, he loved fighting with her. They argue and actually try to kick each other’s butts, not abusively, as they love testing each other. The end results brought about some great love scenes.

I have to say he’s the only hero of The Circle series who has the least angst.

CIRCLE OF DANGER

Arthur Ryker is the leader of The Circle, and mercy, he has some big time angst. Let’s start with the scar on the side of face and body, and the blind eye. They are reminders from when his life fell apart. He’d been near the car that exploded with his mother and father inside. He’d tried to save them.

Then there is the psycho old leader, Theo. He blackmailed a teenager Ryker, promising to not rape a young girl if he obeyed him in all things, including a despicable act that Ryker had thought to never experience again. He has to live with his decisions.

CIRCLE OF DECEPTION

Finally, Rex Drago’s angst has nothing to do with Theo. His is actually tied in with his height. You say, height? Yeah. His dad had the short man syndrome and resented a son who was taller than him by the time he reached high school. Even in elementary, he was taller than the other kids and adults treated him as if he was mentally handicapped. A child of that height should be older and smarter they thought.

He feels he’s not smart enough to be the second in command of The Circle.

Oh, and then there is the relationship between him and his bad ass brother, Jack. He tries to love his older brother, but with too much “water under the bridge,” it may be too late.

Side note about the series:

If you noticed in The Circle series, there is a thin string of the King Arthur legend references. The heaviest are in the first book. Psycho Theo dresses up like a knight, and he believes a sword proves he deserves to be a leader (feeling guilty much?). Of course, The Circle is in reference to the table that all the knights sat around. Last, but not least, Ryker’s first name in CIRCLE OF DANGER. Arthur.

There’s another reference to King Arthur’s legend in the books? Do you know what it is? I’ll give you a hint. It’s a name.